Honest Confessions

376933_10151068361642457_283143734_nA few months back, Nadine wrote a post of actual confessions, and I loved how open and honest she was. I’m in an honest kind of mood today, so here are some of my own confessions.

1. I want to buy a new house, but I’m afraid that once we actually do, I’ll miss our current house so much, because it will always be the first place we lived together.

2. Somewhere around age 19, I made the decision that I didn’t want to have kids, and I haven’t looked back since. TJ has always felt the same way, and I think it’s part of what makes our relationship great. Sometimes, I subconciously feel like it’s something we’ll have to do at some point, and I get really anxious, until I remember that we don’t have to, and no one will ever force us to. The complete relief I feel when I remember that we don’t have to have kids is part of what makes me certain that we’ve made the right choice for us.

3. That being said, I have two baby names in the back of my head, just in case something drastic happened and we changed our minds. No, I won’t tell you what they are, because I don’t want you to steal them, and yes I realize that is insane.

4. One final kid-related confession: I think it’s really fascinating to read other people’s “bumpdates” and birth stories. Maybe it’s because I know I’ll never go through it myself and it’s just a morbid curiosity, or maybe I just like to solidify in my mind that no, I really never want to do it. Either way, I could read those stories for days.

5. I’m really slow to reply to blog comments, but each one seriously makes my day. I don’t really do “goals”, but if there are 2 things that I want to improve at, it’s responding to comments more quickly and reading more books this year.

6. Speaking of reading, over the last year, I’ve done a horrible job at keeping up with it. I bought at least 4 books last year that I didn’t end up finishing, just because I’d rather skim Buzzfeed before bed instead of diving into a book. It embarrasses me, and I’m doing what I can to read more everyday, and not get as distracted by the black hole of the internet.

7. I took off the sponsoring options on my blog when I switched over to WordPress, and ended up kind of loving how freeing it felt. I think I might be ready to bring them back though.

8. I also took about two months off of lining up blogs to sponsor, and that was kind of nice too. Most of January was just about writing my blog the way I did before I knew anything about “blogging rules” and “the blogging community”.

9. I get stressed and grumpy when I know that I have to spend a lot of time away from home. My definition of “away” in this sense is basically more than 2 hours in addition to a work day. (In short, 10 or more hours away from home stresses me out).

10. As a lifelong introvert (who has never wanted to be an extrovert), I think it’s kind of annoying that being an introvert has become popular lately, and it bugs me when over-the-top people, who constantly talk about going out, also talk about what an introvert they are.

11. I hate disagreeing with people, so unless it’s an extreme case, I will agree with just about anyone on just about anything, just to keep the peace, and not ruffle their feathers. Ex. Person 1: “Man, I hate how cold it is out there. I can’t wait until summer.” Me: (thinking: no way, I love winter and chilly days.) “I know – winter has felt long this year!”

12. TJ is an exception to number 11, in that I feel like I can always tell him what I really think, even if we don’t agree. I’ve never felt that level of being completely comfortable with anyone else, and finally having that is a wonderful feeling.

13. I’m a little bummed that TJ and I will never have nieces and nephews, since we’re both only children.

14. I want to write a cookbook more than just about anything, but it also scares me more than just about anything.

15. My real life friends and family all know about my blog, and most of the time, I even share links to my posts on my personal Facebook page (sorry if that’s annoying), but I didn’t share a link to the post I wrote on Friday, because I was afraid it would come off the wrong way. I probably won’t share the link to this post either.

Have anything you’d like to get off your chest? I’d love to hear it.

  • Jessica
    February 12, 2014

    I love reading stories about births too, Mommy blog were the first blogs I ever followed!! And ugh blogging rules, who follows them anyways?!

  • Katie
    February 12, 2014

    I SO think your should write a cook book! What do you have to lose – you could make it a really fun ebook!
    I too love reading birth stories and bump dates (however they are usually jealousy fueled because I can’t wait to have children). I enjoy this confession posts just as much!

  • Brittany
    February 12, 2014

    Girl, I honestly get so anxious when I have to be out of my house too much also! Especially if I have a lot of days of the week I have after work committments, it is so terrible for me!

  • Rose
    February 12, 2014

    My boyfriend and I are not planning on having children either. I find it interesting that both you and your husband are only children and so our my boyfriend and I. I wonder if there is any correlation between that and choosing not to have children?

    • ashleynevis
      March 16, 2014

      Hi Rose! Hmm, I think you’re right about there being a correlation between being only children and not wanting to have kids. Maybe it has something to do with not having siblings around when we were younger? Either way, it’s cool to know we’re not alone!

  • Nadine
    February 12, 2014

    My husband and I don’t plan on having children either. It does take a lot of pressure off your marriage when you don’t feel like you have to!

    I also tend to agree with people just to keep peace as well. It just makes life easier! I have my own opinions and I have no problem keeping them to myself.

    • ashleynevis
      March 16, 2014

      Hey Nadine! I completely agree – there’s no pressure in our marriage, and I love it! Our only relationship goal is to grow together and have the best marriage that we can. Such a nice feeling!

  • Gina
    February 12, 2014

    Im working on reading more this year. I get distracted by the internet too.

  • Jordan
    February 12, 2014

    I admire and respect your decision to not have kids and to share that as well. It seems like such a taboo sometimes but I think no matter what a couple decides, as long as it’s what’s best for them, then who cares? When I was younger, I couldn’t wait to get married, have kids, white picket fence, etc. Now that I’m a little older and finally feel like my life has a set direction, I’m in NO hurry.

  • Erika
    February 13, 2014

    I really enjoyed this post. These “confessional” type posts pull me in… ALMOST as much as weird pregnancy bumpdate and birth stories. I have no interest in children for at least 5 years and yet I can’t tear my eyes away from those. Human nature? Not sure, but it’s an odd phenomenon.

  • Lauren
    February 13, 2014

    I disagree with people like it’s a sport – I guess I enjoy the discussion that comes from different points of view. Unless their POV is annoying. I had to unfollow someone on twitter who lives in my city because she tweeted about the weather daily and I disagreed with her. Some disagreement is okay, but too much is just plain too much.

    The kids thing is so hard! We said we would never but now that 30 is almost here I’m wondering if maybe I might want them. I enjoy hearing that other women don’t feel the “need” to be a mother, though. It makes me feel less crazy, since society seems to think that if you don’t want to be a mother, something’s wrong with you!

  • Nadine
    February 14, 2014

    Thanks for linking to my post! I’m fascinated by bumpdates and birth stories too, although for the opposite reason. I feel like it’s real life research in to what it will be like for me in a few years. I’m also really terrible at blog comments. Sometimes I get anxious that I haven’t replied to comments and I feel like a class A jerk and then I feel like too much time has passed so I just move on. It’s a vicious cycle.

  • David Ryan
    February 18, 2014

    This is beautiful. And no. 2 resonates with me. I don’t plan of having kids too.

  • Melanie @ Ribbons and Rotor Blades
    February 27, 2014

    Ahh I felt he same way as #1. I was so sad when we left our first home this past September. Sadly, we had no choice since my husband is in the military. But we bought and goodness these memories are amazing. That will always be our first house but this is OUR first house. If that makes sense.
    And you might not have blood nieces and nephews but I consider my best friends (soon to be) little girl my niece. Family isn’t about blood. It’s about love and support. So you will have nieces and nephews through friends!!!

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