That Time a Maxi Dress Broke My Nose

I’ve teased this story before, and several (read: 2) people said that they wanted to hear the story. Who am I to keep the people from getting what they want?

And so, the time has come for me to tell you the story of how a maxi dress broke my nose. There are pictures below, and a couple of them show a little blood. Nothing too graphic, but just wanted to warn ya in case you can’t handle seeing that kind of thing.

First things first: I’ll admit that I’ve never had a small nose, but it was always pretty straight.

Now, let me set the scene for you…

It was the Friday before Memorial Day 2012, and TJ and I had been married for exactly 1 month and 5 days. It had been a long and incredibly stressful week at work, and the promise of a 3-day weekend had us feeling on top of the world. After work, we stopped by my parents’ house to show them TJ’s laptop, because they were interested in buying it. Then, TJ and I decided to go out to dinner to try a new Mexican restaurant.

When we got to the restaurant, TJ parked the car and got out, while I grabbed his laptop so I could put it in the trunk while we ate. Crucial mistake, my friends.

When I stood up to get out of the car, somehow the bottom of my dress got caught underneath my seat, but since the dress was made of stretchy material, I didn’t notice until I was out of the car, and had already taken a few steps. By the time the dress stretched to its max, I was mid-step, and the next thing I know, I was falling face down, unable to put my hands out in front of me because I was holding TJ’s laptop. At some point, the laptop went flying across the parking lot, and I tried to get my hands down to catch me in time.

I did get my hands down to the asphalt (permanently bending my new wedding band), but not before my nose smashed into the pavement. I remember my new husband, completely confused by what was happening, looking down at me, and just saying, “Oh, Ashley. Oh no.” By then, I was just fully realizing what was happening, and I was swiping my tongue over my teeth to make sure none were missing. TJ grabbed me a beach towel that was in the trunk of the car, and ran into the restaurant to get me some ice, but they told him that they couldn’t give it to him, because it would be considered “administering first aid”, and they legally couldn’t do that. He was not happy, and he ran back outside to me, and rushed me to the nearest hospital.

Needless to say, we didn’t get to try that Mexican restaurant, so TJ ended up grabbing us some Cheez-its while we waited to see the doctor. I remember joking with him that I didn’t wait very long to test out the “in sickness and in health” aspect of our wedding vows.

That 3-day weekend wasn’t anything that we had imagined it would be, but I have to say, it wasn’t totally horrible either. We spent the entire weekend cuddling on the couch watching movies and TV shows, laughing as my face drastically changed shape and size as the weekend went on.

So guys, watch out for maxi dresses – they’re cute, but sneaky. The more you know.

Today, the scar at the tip is pretty much gone, and now I have a little bump in the bridge of my nose
15 Comments
  • Kate
    September 12, 2013

    Oh my gosh noooo!!! I don’t mean to lol but the simplicity behind how something so small could impact something so major is funny… it’s just one of those awful mishaps in life I think!
    And your nose is all good now and cute so it’s good 😉
    Making a mental note to never buy a maxi dress…

  • Kristin
    September 12, 2013

    OH NO!!! So I have to admit I laughed a little but only at your description and not at your expense. lol. You still have a cute nose, don’t worry!!

    Glad I found your blog!! We’re doing a Thirsty Thursday linkup on mine today if you’re interested in checkout out some new drank ideas!! hopelesslyeverafter.blogspot.com

  • Tami
    September 12, 2013

    YES! The story I’ve been waiting for. And it was even better than I imagined!! I’m so sorry you broke your nose, but it is such a hilarious story. Geez! Fashion hurts.

  • Rachel
    September 12, 2013

    Oh you poor thing! That is horrible!!

  • Pamela Poole
    September 12, 2013

    OH NO. I’m making myself a note and i’m not going to by maxi dresses ever.

  • Erin LFF
    September 12, 2013

    Ohmy goshhh! I’m glad you can laugh about it now, and the changing face pictures had me laughing- I’m sorry! 😉

  • Miss Chelsea
    September 12, 2013

    ouch ouch ouch

  • Pleas(e) and Carrots
    September 12, 2013

    OMG that is awful, you poor thing! I always shut my maxi dresses in the car door but thankfully I have never actually fallen; now I am scared!! I am glad it wasn’t worse though! (did the laptop survive? haha)

  • Hayley!
    September 12, 2013

    Oh my gosh! I don’t know if I feel worse for your husband or you! I know he must have felt so helpless! I’m getting a good laugh out of picturing this, although I know it probably reallyyyy hurt. Glad to see your nose survived! You can’t even tell you broke it!

  • abby staffieri
    September 12, 2013

    I love hearing clumsy stories….it makes me feel better about my own clumsy moments lol My husband would have reacted the same way and gotten so mad at the restaurant!

  • Erin @ Love, the Campbells
    September 13, 2013

    Oh my goodness! Haha ouch ( but I’m so glad I’m not alone in clumsiness althoughg I’m so in love with maxi dresses I would probably still wear the maxi dresses and make the same mistake over and over!).

  • Megan C. Stroup
    September 15, 2013

    Oh dear! Well I’ve never noticed the bump, but if anyone ever does, at least you have a funny story to tell!! Haha.

  • Alex Fahey
    September 15, 2013

    Oh my gosh! I am so sorry this happened to you! When my husband and were just married he was rubbing my feet with lotion and about 30 minutes later I decided to go take a shower. I wasn’t really thinking, but I stepped in and completely fell taking the shower curtain with me. My husband had a similar reaction of ‘oh babe no’ ‘are you okay’ And I was just laying there with the shower curtain tangled around me 🙂 I also I have crazy maxi dress story that I shared over at my blog. It’s not nearly as bad as yours, but pretty embarrassing. http://alexfahey.blogspot.kr/2013/08/friday-flashback-62.html

  • Amanda G
    September 18, 2013

    Ah! We are nose bump twins. Except, I don’t have a cool story involving a maxi dress. I looked up when someone said “heads up” when I was cheering at a game and got decked full speed by a basketball and broke my nose. I still have my bump on the bridge of my nose. Now every time I’m wearing a maxi dress, I’ll have to double check that I’m not going to trip!

    xo,
    Amanda
    The Pretty Pinhead

  • Clem
    December 28, 2013

    Ok ow. I broke my nose in college as just looking at these pics brings me back. Glad you’re all healed now 🙂

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